ARSENAL 2 - 0 WOLVES: ROBIN VAN PERSIE BREAKS RECORDS AND MICK MCCARTHY IS CLASSY.

Robin van Persie, Michael McCarthy. The former breaks records. The latter's just classy.

Last time we played Wolves (which was in November, by the way) we finished the match with the exact same scoreline as today - this would have to be the only similarity between the two games.

The former, was a rather nervy affair. Marouane Chamakh scored in the first and the last minutes of the match to secure the points. However, the hero of the day, turned out to be the one and only Lukas Fabianski - after making a string of crucial saves. I think, after that game, everyone became a bit more at ease with having him as our number one.

I have to say, before he got injured, I was secretly hoping he would emulate his performance in today's game as well. Just so I could use "BAMBI FENDS OFF WOLVES" as my main headline. Since I missed out on that opportunity the last time. Oh well...

Anyway, it was a completely different story this time around.

For one thing, it wasn't Chamakh who was leading our attack, it was Robin van Persie - top scorer in the Premier League in 2011.  He scored both of our goals and could have easily had another hat-trick. He now has ELEVEN Premier League goals and according to Infostrada - he's broken a record for most goals scored in first two months of a calendar year.

Had he been fit from August through November, one would assume we'd be a lot closer to the top of the table than we are at the moment. He's always been world-class but I guess we're finally starting to see and benefit from it. For how long? I don't know. Every time we're starting to believe his problems are behind him - the rug is pulled from under our feet by another injury.

Then there's Jack Wishere, who very obviously is high on confidence after his midweek England debut. Some of the passes, which he managed to pick out, were absolutely brilliant.

The kind of passes we are used to seeing from Cesc - who had a quiet game overall (by his standards) and was extremely wasteful in front of goal, it has to be mentioned.

Which segues nicely to my next point: HOW MANY FUCKING CHANCES DO WE NEED TO SCORE A GOAL? AARRRGGGGGGGHHHH!!11!!1

It is so unbelievably frustrating to watch, how we squander chance after chance. There were periods in that match, when I thought we'd never score another goal...ever again. When Van Persie was through on goal for his second, I honestly expected it to either go wide or hit the post.

Theo in particular, has been making some questionable decisions in front of goal, lately. His second half miss (of the match) was especially irritating. Is Thierry Henry still training with us? Maybe he needs to show Walcott some of his DVD's (with Henry on it I mean, not some random stuff like "Aladdin" - which i assume Theo would enjoy). I take nothing away from his assist, though.

In defence, I thought we looked comfortable and dealt with most of the set-pieces - which ironically account for 90% of the goals conceded for Arsenal and goals scored for Wolves (these stats are unconfirmed).

There wasn't a hint of any kind of hangover from last Saturday's nightmarish second half and I did not expect one, to be honest. We played that second half with ten men against Newcastle's TWELVE (get it? it's a Phil Dowd diss) and no Johan Djourou.

A couple of years ago no one would've predicted just how instrumental and important of a role Djourou would play for us. These statistics from OptaJean pretty much sum up that second half against Newcastle:

Djourou/Koscielny: 1 goal conceded every 295 mins (2 goals in 590 mins), 

Squillaci/Koscielny: 1 every 47 mins (20 in 949).

HOLY SHIT!

 Afterward Wolves' boss Mick McCarthy said this:

"There was a murder going on. They have murdered us today - all over the park, from 1 to 11, they were better than us, stronger than us and quicker than us. I have to admire their class and the way they play. We were spanked."

Oh, whatever you...wait, what? The manager of the losing team admits they were outplayed? WHY?

He could've complained about how our second goal should've been ruled out for offside or how they were denied a "stonewall" penalty. His team is rock bottom and he doesn't even try to divert attention and simply admits their shortcomings?

What is the world coming to?

*cough* David Moyes *cough*

ARSENAL 2 - 1 EVERTON: MOYES AND MASON ARE SITTING IN A TREE - F.U.C.K.I.N.G.

A quick recap of yesterday's match.

Ok, so yesterday we played Everton at the Emirates and we won. It was a great match and three very important points in the bag, especially since everyone flat-out refuses to beat Man Utd.

However instead of the thorough statistical analysis of the match (ha-ha), I want to talk about several things which I found to be utterly irritating during yesterdays game - Lee Mason, Stephen Child and David Moyes.

Let's start with the disastrous officiating.

For the opening goal, Seamus Coleman played a pass to Louis Saha, Koscielny attempted an overhead kick to clear the ball - slightly touching it, before Saha smashed it past Szczesny. Oh, I almost forgot, Saha was at least a yard offside.

The entire stadium, the managers, the players and all the TV viewers - SAW IT.  Absolutely everyone - except the person who's actually hired to do it. It was an unbelievably bad decision from Stephen Child to allow it. Yes, Koscielny got a touch but Saha was already offside when Coleman's pass was played.  

The stadium was roaring and when Mason went over to the linesman for a chat/explanation, I was quietly hoping, he was trying to avoid the colossal fuck up. But I came to my senses as soon he pointed to the center-circle, several seconds later. FUCK. FUCKITY. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK.

Had Everton managed to hold on to that goal, it would've signaled the end for out title aspirations and a looming shitstorm for Lee Mason. One shit refereeing decision almost wrecked our season - the severity of that sentence scares me to no end.

There should be repercussions for Mason and Child, like in any other profession. If you cannot adequately do your job, usually you're not allowed to continue.

If you're getting a blood transfusion and the doctor in charge accidentally infects you with AIDS, you wouldn't dismiss it as just a "human error", forget about it and move on, would you? The answer is "FUCK NO!" That fucker ruined your life and the least you would do is make sure he's never allowed to step foot in a hospital.

Well,  then you would agree the situation with Lee Mason and his minion is no different. Their monstrous cock up yesterday, almost infected our title challenge with AIDS, we were 20 minutes away from conceding the league to Man Utd - there and then.

But will the FA actually act on it, demote them, discipline them? Of course not. They keep preaching that referees must be respected but the truth is, more often than not - they don't deserve any fucking respect.

We keep seeing referees make the kind of "blunders" which we thought weren't possible for professionals to make, yet the people in charge of the so-called "best league in he world" have no hesitation in employing them. I think the fact that Howard Webb is supposed to be the best referee in England tells its own story.

 ARRRGGHHH!1111!!!!!!!!!1

Thankfully the feeling of injustice was the fuel for the great second half where we managed to turn the game on its head. Hand on heart - I didn't think we could do it.

I thought it was going to be one of those days - a terrible decision would cost us the game. Then Arsene would say something in his post-match interview about the officials which the FA would fine him for and then Sky Sports and all the back pages would discuss it for awhile before deciding that Lee Mason is just a human and we, apparently, all make mistakes. Case closed.

BUT Arsenal had other ideas in mind. First, Cesc's pass found Arshavin (who had come on as a sub eight minutes earlier) in the box and through slight deflection via Rodwell's head he comfortably beat Howard, to net his first goal since the draw at Wigan.

Then, six minutes later came the winner. Van Persie's corner found Koscielny's head before finding the back of the net.

I could feel the vibrations (feel it, feel it) of the Emirates through my TV. The celebrations were glorious.

There was about 15 minutes of normal time and FIVE minutes of injury time left to play but we managed to hang on.

At the final whistle I felt so exhausted, even though I barely moved throughout the match.

What a fantastic comeback, absolutely NOTHING could spoil it...oh wait, what's that?

Everton boss David Moyes:  

"The comments which Cesc Fabregas made to the fourth official and referee at half time deserved a sending off. He's a big player for them. I think it changed the flow of the game. I'm not going to repeat what he said, I'll let them tell you what he said."

Um...what?

Whatever those comments were, they were 100% deserved. IF, in fact, they were actually made.

At first, I thought maybe Moyes, is simply trying to stir some shit in order to divert attention from the fact that his team is now only three points off the relegation zone. But then it dawned on me - he's a GINGER. HA! This illogical attention seeking is an attempt to overcompensate for the fact that he will never be loved!

Seriously though, Everton had four shots on target, one of which resulted in an unjust goal that should have never been allowed to stand. Moyes, of all people, really has nothing to complain about here.

I've always liked Everton but THIS is simply pathetic. If you want us to believe your bullshit story David Moyes, then I only have one thing to say to you:

TITS OR GTFO!!!

Uh...actually...umm...that came out wrong.

PICS OR GTFO. Yes, pics. NOT tits.

The last thing I want do is look at David Moyes' tits.

Definitely.

UPDATE: David Moyes has denied the claims which suggest he could be lying. CLICK HERE to watch his interview (It's worth watching, believe me).